I Saw The Short-Shorts And All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt

The Basketbawful Worsties of 07-08 are pretty awesome. Long, but worth it. Who can forget such worst moments as:

- Bulls fans chanting for Kobe
- Lakers wearing short-shorts
- Smush Parker losing an NBA spot over a $12 parking fee
- Webber returing to the Warriors ("I was actually upset he was taking minutes from Austin Croshere.")

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4


/ "We all get heavier as we get older because there's a lot more information in our heads." - Vlade Divac

Laker Mancrush

I Like The Fear

I do declare, that was quite a lovely evening of basketball.

First, I get home in time to see the Suns game out of reach early in the 4th, which meant that a win by the Lakers would clinch the Division. Nooooiice.

Second, as I'm getting ready to leave, Sony calls and convinces me to watch that hilarious hockey check by VladRad on Tyson Chandler. Great to see him fired up, but the adrenaline didn't seem to do much for his outside shot.

Third, I played a very entertaining 3 hours of basketball down in the Mont. With 16 guys we played rotating winners/losers court 4-on-4, and my team never lost despite having a 10-year-old as our fourth. There is some pretty decent talent there mind you -- mostly in the 21-29 age group, including a few guys that play on the Ohlone college squad. In the fifth game the one loudmouth hick in a gym full of otherwise classy, no-argue players, rolls his ankle untouched on some ridiculous fading 3-point turnaround jumper. It wasn't too bad, but he threw a hissy fit and basically challenged my teammate to a fight, claiming he was pushed. The best part: the remaining 15 of us all told him to go home an not come back. Oh yeah, then we ran full with subs and my team won a 20-min. timed game by 2. Nooooiice.

Was there something else? Oh yeah, Fourth: I get home well after midnight, sore but satisfied (no homo), and get to watch that great Laker win over the Big Easy CP3s. Someone 'ruined' the outcome for me, so that 3rd quarter only stung a little. But a salve was at hand: that dunk (above) by Kobe was incredible -- the slo-mo really does it justice. And speaking of justice, that clinches the division and moves the Lakers to the #2 spot and a potential 1st-round match-up with our bitches the Mavs. What do you think, Stu? Nooooiice.

So did the MVP race just turn back in our favor? I'm still not buying it. If the players or coaches or GMs voted, Kobe would win in a landslide. And yes I know that a couple LA Times 'informal poll of voters' has him winning, but the 'journalists' that vote are lard-ass haters extraordinaire (this not an opinion, but a verifiable fact). And as we've seen in the difference in Obama vote totals in open caucuses vs. balloting, there is something about the privacy of a voting booth that clarifies the mind and allows the voter to proceed with complete irrationality and unfettered bias. Also, most of the writers are white, and white people do love assists.

Never mind that CP3 is sort of a defensive liability -- sure he gets some nice steals, but so does Baron Davis, and so did Smush Parker. Can anyone seriously watch last night's game and think, wow those two superstars really battled it out? You mean Kobe and Pargo? And since stats can't tell the whole story, it should come down to the intangibles of Leadership, Indomitable Will, and, I don't know, how about Which Player Strikes The Most Fear Into The Hearts Of His Opponents? (Answer: Kobe, Kobe, Kobe. And KG second.)



If it comes down to this "who is most valuable to his team" nonsense, I might have to go with Lebron James. That Cavs team wouldn't win 20 games without Lebron. But is anyone worried about them on the playoffs? Or the Hornets? It is to laugh. There are three and only three contenders for the championship right now: Celtics, Spurs, and Your Los Angeles Lakers. You feel that fear? It's because we're close.

Pop's Tart

Popovich on the Pau trade:

"What they did in Memphis is beyond comprehension," said Popovich. "There should be a trade committee that can scratch all trades that make no sense. I just wish I had been on a trade committee that oversees NBA trades. I'd like to elect myself to that committee. I would have voted no to the L.A. trade."

When told that Wallace had challenged executives to criticize the deal publicly, Popovich replied, "Well, there you go. I'm on the record."

Man I love Gregg Popovich (agape not eros, so stop right there). He is always good for a speaking-his-mind quote, and he's usually right. If I wasn't a Laker fan, I'd be pissed at that trade too. See: Garnett to Boston for a box of spare parts.

Big game tonight

Tough loss at Milwaukee... Lakers controlled that game until the 4th, and then no one on the Bucks could miss a shot no matter how contested.

Celtics are 9-1 having played only one good team -- Orlando -- and lost. So with the Laker game tonight, they are showing some, um... love?

"There are a lot of people talking about how the Western Conference is head over heels above the East," Pierce said. "The Lakers will be a good test for us."

Pierce added: "no homo." I love how reporters leave that stuff in, rather than editing like, "is head [and shoulders] above the East."

Phil's Man Crush

Too appropriate for this blog not to post... Phil's comment after the SA loss:

"We call this a 'Brokeback Mountain' game because there's so much
penetration and kick-outs"

Then nobody of any importance got upset, so Phil had to apologize to "cowboys, Texans, horses." And zinged ESPN for making it an issue.

Is it me, or is that joke simply not a gay joke? You could use pretty much any movie known for sex. Which I guess they don't make anymore, except for porn or straight-to-skinemax.